And the hits keep coming ....

Wow.

This month my website is on track to receive more than 100,000 hits.

From the stats kept my my web host, you're reading the blog in some 68 nations, some of which I've never heard of before, but I'm learning more about them.

FYI, I'm asking my webmaster to attach a translator to the page so you can click it to translate the blog into your primary language if it's not English. Much of the credit for this website goes to him. John Beresford (himself a novelist, lyricist, poet and singer) has been working hard and valiantly on this website to help inform, inspire and empower you for many years.

It's very exciting, and I'm thrilled to think you're interested in what I'm thinking or writing or doing or how I write or-- why ever it is you tune in.

Thanks for your kind attention. The stats also say you download many of the photos I use, especially of my pets.

Here's a snapshot of JR at my Master Writers' retreat recently. I had him trimmed to keep him cool for the summer, but when temperatures drop he needs a little shirt to keep him warm.

I'm not into the whole put clothes on your dog so they'll look cute thing. It's just a practical matter and to keep him warm and healthy.

He got his white shirt filthy and wet playing for hours with his BFF Winston, a French Bulldog puppy; I took it off to pull on his clean red shirt so he wouldn't get cold.

Everyone was blown away at what a terrific, well-behaved, quiet and snugly little guy he is.

Here's Allie Cat being regal. For a moment there is peace and tranquility. Then, suddenly:





Allie Cat attacks JR and they wrestle. This happens at least twice a day. They chase each other back and forth, in and out of the house to slap a half nelson on each other.

Mistletoe referees.

<-Here, Allie and an untrimmed JR wrestle. They remind me of Inspector Clouseau and his manservant in Blake Edwards' A Shot in the Dark, surprising each other when they least expect to be assaulted.

For some reason, Allie never extends her claws or bites, and JR never gets rough with her. Such happy little souls. I just wish they'd learn to take out the garbage or wash dishes or dust or at least re-make the bed after they've been wrestling on it...

Thank you again for reading my blog and checking out my website - feel free to comment!

With whom are you careful?

A recent blog posted by my best mate poet-writer-lyricist-protege John Beresford entitled Someone loves you brought up all sorts of thoughts for me.

In his blog, John wonders why it is we seem to put more effort into our interactions with people we don't know than for the people with whom we share our lives most intimately.

You know, we spiff up for someone we want to impress, then feel no compunction about doing nothing about our appearance for the very person who does the most for us - in fact the very person who has to look at us most of the time.

It reminded me of an agent who repped my writing and directing awhile back. At first I considered her a bit closed off.

You must remember by contrast, my life is an open book. I'm pretty transparent, though I seldom discuss my family or others in my life to protect their privacy - except when one of my coachees deserves praise or congratulations!

I'm not sure why she liked me so much - perhaps it was that unshielded openness.

A true maple leaf Canadian, she is very down to earth, modest and quiet. She and her husband have one child.

Knowing how protective she is of her family and personal life, I was incredibly honored to be invited to stay with her family more than once.

The home is impeccably decorated - simple but elegant - and she is a gourmet cook.

I finally realized what was so impacting and impressive about her and her relationships with her family and those close to her: she wasn't wary - she was careful. Careful about whom she lets into her circle because she is someone who does what she says she'll do.

She is thoughtful, giving her very best to her immediate family and others who become part of her extended family. In order to be able to do that, she keeps her extended family circle small.

People are not treated cavalierly in her world. They are treated respectfully and she expects the same in return.

Promises are kept. When she says, "Call you later," she means she'll actually phone you soon. It's a committment, not a careless remark. She expects the same from you.

She carefully chooses what she cooks for herself, her family and guests (our favorite foods!); then prepares it -- with love. I guarantee you her cooking is *amazing!*

Since I don't cook, I clean up and do dishes with love ... ;-)

Decisions are made with scrupulous consideration. She and her husband communicate about decisions regarding their child, themselves and each other. They both have demanding careers.

Their unspoiled child is also thoughtful, respectful and considerate. And successful!

One thing that also stands out: their caring, sensitive actions appear effortless and easy.

I felt so appreciated, cared for and esteemed when I was around them; and that door swung both ways. Not because it was expected, but because I wanted to show them my appreciation and gratitude for all they did.

They brought my relationship game way up, so I wanted to make myself and others feel that special and respected.

I was also reminded the way we treat others closest to us is generally a reflection of how we think of ourselves. How we treat others we care about is a pretty good barometer of where we are with our own souls.

The folks who share their lives with us intimatly or with whom we are closest in work or play deserve our best, our deepest caring and highest esteem.

I will *never* forget having a discussion with a co-worker who blew off a meeting with another coworker at the last minute because she had a personal problem to work out.

She just left me a message saying she wouldn't even be back in town for a couple days.

When I saw her I asked why she felt she could just blow off our meeting without finding another way to deal with her personal situation. It felt pretty disrespectful and as if breaking her word to us wasn't a big deal to her.

She said, "I knew I could cancel because it was *just* (coworker NAME), and we could always have the meeting another time."

HUH? Say, WHAT? In very few words, she had discounted our coworker and the meeting more than if she had called people names and left the room screaming and yelling.

I responded, "I don't believe (coworker NAME) thinks of herself as *just* (coworker NAME). You didn't give me enough notice to cancel the meeting, so she still showed up and we had the meeting without you."

Which was the problem, but the absent coworker indicated it did not matter to her.

I realized this is the way she chose to treat her work family.

And it made me think of my agent/friend, realizing that she would never - never - treat anyone this way, nor would she allow them to treat her this way.

It gave me great insight into the coworker's relationship values - which I found untrustworthy - and the working relationship ended shortly thereafter.

In so many ways, we are members of several families at once.

How do you treat those with whom you are closest?

It's not the grand gestures that make the difference. It is the little things. The tender thanks for being you touch, email or card; making a favorite dish; the extra effort we make to create a warm connection or make a person feel seen, heard and understood.

I try to welcome people the same way my dogs and cat greet me - except I don't wag my tail or bark. They're always excited to see me and make it clear that in their eyes I am adored. I let them know the feeling is mutual.

Everyone who knows me understands what I mean when I say I like to treat people as well as I treat my dogs. *That* is a compliment! And of course, I like to be treated as well as they treat me!

It doesn't take a lot of work - just a little thought and understanding where our priorities lie.

Outfoxing a kitten

My kitten, Allie Cat, kept going where she ought not - in the bathtub.

The cleaning substances we've used on the tub make it a very unhealthy place for any animal to lick, which they tend to want to do for some odd reason.

There is plenty of water to drink in two separate places in my house but she still headed toward the tub.

Well, cats *hate* citrus and pepper.

So I generously sprinkled black pepper on the side of the tub and where she would land if she jumped in.

She approached the side of the peppered tub, sniffing the objectionable flakes at least a couple times the first day - gingerly setting her paw on it. Suddenly she realized she touched something she discovered to be awful because she had to lick it off.
She sniffed at the tub's side twice the next day, leaving it immediately, not bothering to put her paw on the pepper; once the third day and has not gone near it since.

I'll keep it on the tub's side another week because she may want to test it another time or two, after which I'll brush it off - and never be concerned about her going near it again.

If there's anything I don't want her to go near, I just sprinkle pepper on and/or around it. The hotter the pepper flakes (like those you use on pizza) the more offensive it is to cats and the longer lasting it is if it's used outside where it can be rained on or blown away.

FYI, kitten and cat owners.

I don't know if it works as well for dogs, because mine don't get into things they shouldn't - at least yet - so I haven't put it anywhere I need them to avoid. But I can say they haven't gone near the peppered tub!